The little things that make you a classy punter

There are a few small things that make the difference between being a regular customer and a classy gentleman.

After many years of escorting, I can predict a great encounter by the way someone speaks, the wine they choose, and the questions they ask. This is the stuff that elevates you from the level of ‘regular guy’ to ‘valued client’.

Why should you bother to please your provider? Good question.

I think it’s all about showing you’ve made an effort.  The more your playmate appreciates you, the more you’re enthusiastic they'll be … and the more time they'll make for you in the future.

Here are a few ways to make yourself stand out from the crowd.

Bring your cash payment in an envelope

This is the classic gentleman’s move: slipping your escort an envelope with the agreed fee as soon as she walks through the door. Depending on the local laws, you may need to pop it somewhere visible, then discreetly excuse yourself to the bathroom so that the escort can collect it.

When I have to ask for money, it disrupts the mood; also, an envelope is much more classy than a big lump of cash.

Bonus points: Put the cash inside a thank-you card, with a personalized message.

Prepare some drinks

Why not start the night off with a nice bottle of wine or champagne? You probably won’t get through more than a glass, but it’s a great way to break the ice. Make sure you open the bottle in front of your worker, so they can see you haven’t spiked it with anything.

Bonus points: Ask what they prefer to drink beforehand. Not everyone likes alcohol!

When it comes to hygiene, go the extra mile

Personal grooming is obvious, and of course, you will have showered before your appointment. But if you want your playmate to get close to you, it helps to put in some extra effort so that you look, feel, and smell amazing.

Some ideas:

• Not sure what to wear? Pretend you're going out to a nice restaurant, and dress accordingly
• Use mouthwash, so your kisses are minty-fresh
• Shave or tidy your pubic hair - it means you'll get more attention down there because you smell and taste pleasant
• If you have a beard, wash and condition it so you don't give your escort 'pash rash'
• Use a quality aftershave or cologne. Standard men's deodorant smells bad up close and tastes even worse. A signature scent, on the other hand, gives you an aura that your worker will come to know and appreciate

Bonus points: If you’re hosting, leave some mouthwash and a clean glass by the bathroom sink, in case your escort would like to freshen up too.

Avoid the obvious questions

Despite the fact that most escorts are intelligent and professional, myths seem to persist. There are certain things escorts hear over and over, and hearing them yet again from you won’t raise her opinion.

Avoid questions like:

• “Does your husband know you do this?”
• “Are you clean?”
• “Are you doing this to pay your way through uni?”

Bonus points: Watch 'Shit They Say to Sex Workers.'

Respect your escort's boundaries

Your escort works hard to create a comfortable environment for you that allows you to experience sex and intimacy. But they have their own needs too.

One of these is the need to feel safe...another is the right to privacy. A client who pries into our personal lives or makes us feel uneasy often won't be a client for long.

Some things to avoid:

• Asking about their personal lives: childhood, parents, family or romantic partners.
• Pushing for unpaid dates, even subtly, eg, "You're exactly the kind of girl I'd want to marry."
• Bringing up topics that might be uncomfortable, such as, "Have you ever met any creeps in this job?"

Bonus points: If the conversation feels like it's going in a risky direction, check in by asking, "Is this topic getting too personal for you? Just let me know if there's anything you're not comfortable talking about."

Be an active participant

One of the nice things about for paying for sex is that you aren’t obligated to do anything you don’t want to. Some guys take this a little far, though, and simply ‘starfish’ on the bed while their escort exhausts themselves.

You need to join in to get the most out of your experience. Try a few different positions, or if for medical or fitness reasons you need to lie down, use your hands or give enthusiastic feedback to show you’re completely involved.

Bonus points: Ask for her favorite position.

The small stuff really makes a difference

I hope that’s helped give you a bit of an edge!

While escorts rarely demand red-carpet treatment, we definitely notice the small things. I'll always take more time and make more effort with someone who has put effort into pleasing me too.